Monday, April 04, 2011

To hijab or Not to hijab? That's the question....

Alhamdulillah! I love looking at pictures of my friends that are finally hijabi-fied! Heheh Somehow, I have always befriend girls that don't wear hijab. You see, I have been wearing the headscarf since I was probably 9 or 10 years old. Reason I say headscarf is because at that time I wasn't covering myself up as a true hijabi, if that makes any sense. I was the girl who wears headscarf with short sleeved top/skin tight attire. When I was in high school, I tried to loosen and lengthen my clothing. I started wearing headscarf because my Mom had trained me to do so. Even when I was in primary school she made sure I wore kurung and headscarf. After school, I was reminded to donned the headscarf when I want to go out and play with my friends even if it was in front of our house. Alhamdulillah, I am lucky to have my Mom to protect me since I was small. Even though I wasn't sure of why I was wearing it, I felt comfortable wearing it amongst my friends. They didn't judge me for my headscarf nor did I judge them for their 'free hair'.

Along the years, my Mom started educating me more about hijab. She taught me why girls have to cover themselves. Finally I understood the meaning of hijab for definite. I always thought to myself, why is it that girls do not wear hijab if it is 'wajib' upon us to wear it? I dare not ask any of my friends why they do not wear the hijab. I had friends who tried to wear the hijab but every now and then they'll go back to their 'free hair' days. Never did I have the guts to question their actions. To be honest, my close friends are mostly non hijabis however, our friendship still remained regardless of our appearances.

Recently when I was in Malaysia, my best friend asked me, "Iva, you have been wearing headscarf ever since I could remember. Why is it that you never forced/asked me to wear the headscarf too?" My answer to her was "Tasha, I believe that one fine day Allah will open your mind and heart when HE thinks you are ready to wear hijab. Maybe the reason you are my bestfriend is because HE wants you to see how my life as a hijabi has been so far and to learn from it. Personally, I don't even know how to advise you on wearing the hijab because I don't want to advise you the wrong way and put you off hijab straight away." As per the hadith narrated Abu Musa that when Allah's Messenger salallahualaihiwasalam sent him and Mu'adh bin Jabal to Yemen, he said to them, "Make things easy for the people(treat the people in the most agreeable easy way), and do not make things difficult for them, and give them glad tidings, and do not repel them(i.e TO MAKE THE PEOPLE HATE GOOD DEEDS AND TO RUN AWAY FROM ISLAM), and you should both work in cooperation and mutual understanding, obey each other." [Sahih Bukhari] She understood my point and agreed that she was not ready to wear the hijab yet. No doubt she's been thinking about it but she just doesn't feel fully ready to wear the hijab.

I've never looked or acted differently with people who don't wear the hijab. Personally, I know how hard it is to be a hijabi. Realise how I used headscarf at the beginning? This was because at that time I wasn't dressed as how we are asked to in the Al-Quran:
  • "And enjoin believing women to cast down their looks and guard their private oarts and not reveal their adronment except that which is revealed of itself, and to draw their viels over their bosoms................"(Al-Nur:31) 
  • O Prophet! Say to your wives and your daughters and the women of the faithful to draw their outergarments (jilbabs) close around themselves; that is better that they will be recognized and not molested. Allah is Most Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Al-Ahzab:59)

Like I said, I was still wearing inappropriate clothing for a while even though I was already wearing a headscarf. So for a non hijabi who wants to become a hijabi, they really need to change a lot. For starters, they need to see if their wardrobe are fully hijab friendly ie; modest clothing. If not, they would have to revamp and start from scratch and this of course incurs money. But hey, if there's a will there's always a way, Insha'Allah.

The reason I have never asked my friends about hijab is because I don't feel I am ready to reason out with them at that time. I wouldn't want them to question me and they won't get the answer that they need. Alhamdulillah now that I know why and how important it is for us to wear the hijab, I welcome questions from anyone regarding hijab. I have had people asking me how I could possibly wear a hijab in Sunny Malaysia, but of course the most famous question is, why do I even have to wear hijab (this of course came from my friends in the UK). Since I have searched and been bombarded with these questions, I can finally answer them with confidence and not give the 'because my Mom asked me to and it states in the Quran'. I have also had experience on wearing it and befriend people who don't, I know what's the difference of being a hijabi and non hijabi have towards the society.

So, if any of you are thinking of wearing the hijab, first ask yourself, why are you wanting to wear it? How important it is to wear it? How would it affect your lifestyle if you were to wear it? Ask yourself or discuss with others if you are having doubts, Insha'Allah, HE will guide you through it once you have set your mind for it. I am sure most of us girls' are scared that we won't look pretty if we were to wear the hijab, again, keep asking yourself, would Allah-our own creator make us look like a fool/unpretty? If you yourself were to do anything, wouldn't you give the best output to it? Of course you would want people to be impressed with your good work, right? So again, would Allah, our creator want us to look ugly when HE has planned everything way carefully and perfectly?? The answer is, ABSOLUTELY NOT! Don't hesitate to ask questions. Talking and sharing your thoughts with others will Insha'Allah broaden your mind more. Don't just leave your thoughts to the side. In the end of the day, Allah swt will help you through it, regardless!


Raja Iva Adnanne said...

Nadhiah Noran, Natasha Mohamad Shah, Jik Es and 3 others like this.

Fahimeh Yousef Double like
04 April at 01:36 · LikeUnlike
Jik Es nice!
04 April at 06:14 · LikeUnlike
Claire Waldron I love your blog :) x
04 April at 09:49 · LikeUnlike
Natasha Mohamad Shah Luvss ur blog so much... ! Xoxo
04 April at 15:02 · LikeUnlike
Raja Iskandar Iva Wow! Alhamdulillah, I'm so glad u guys/girls could relate to this! :)

Claire: awww, thanks hun! Hope one day my blog will be beneficial to u too, maybe the parenting bit? ;)
04 April at 17:12 · LikeUnlike
Claire Waldron I hope so! :)
04 April at 21:13 · LikeUnlike
Nadhiah Noran Two thumbs up for this beautiful blogs, Iva~!! ;)
05 April at 04:31 · LikeUnlike
Raja Iskandar Iva Kak Nadhiah: thank you! Welcome back to the housewife life! Hehehe Now u have more time to read my ramblings kan? ;)
05 April at 12:40 · LikeUnlike
Jessica Hill you have a real talent for writing Iva when i go to dubai soon im actually going to wear a abaya for a few days to experience it and im quite looking forward to it you no :) x
06 April at 21:41 · LikeUnlike
Raja Iskandar Iva Jess: Alhamdulillah!! Thanks babe!! When r u off to Dubai? They've got nice abayas there!! It's good that u want to experience it for urself. Do let me know how it feels like to cover up :) xx
06 April at

SaritaAgerman said...

Hey! This was really interesting. Thought you might like this post about muslims wearing (or not wearing) hijab and why we shouldn't judge them:

Have a lovely weekend!

Raja Iva Adnanne said...

Thank you for your comment! Enjoyed reading your post too!! :) WIll drop by again soon Insha'Allah.

Take care!