Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Are you ACTUALLY having any SEX???!!

Hands down those of you who think asking married couples whether they've conceived is rather... offensive. *hands down* Personally, I find it VERY offensive. I think being asked when/if I've conceived is just like asking me if I am actually having SEX!!!! "So, any baby yet?" Or "You are not planning, are you?" At the moment, I am free from these type of Qs because Khairaldin is only 7 months old. But I can assure you once he hits 1 year old people will start asking 'so, when's the next one/two/three?' It never ends until you hit the big 4-0 (in age I mean). Lo and behold, the next person who asks such question will get a thorough, almost graphic like, explanation from us that YES! we are having sex, thank you very much. :)

Sex is definitely the main 'ritual' to making babies. However, there are other 'things' that one need to be aware of if some people have not yet conceived. For instance, health issues or other various issues that lead to a no show in baby making production :D Don't this type of questioners question themselves first before asking THE question? Hehehe I mean, what if the couples have been trying but are not showered with any babies just yet? Wouldn't it create tension between the couples?

Fact to the matter is, why is there a need to ask these type of questions?! Questions like these should be refrained from discussing, ever. If the couples wanted to announce their joyous moment, I'm sure they'll give you the news first hand. It is best if we bear in mind that certain things are not meant to be shared openly. I've known couples who've been married for a few years and are still trying to conceive. It doesn't help when they get questions about their 'sex life' every now and then because you need to be stress free in order to conceive. So imagine this, having sex and imagining those people asking you the questions you never had answers for. That is just depressing and rather 'ewwwww'.

Let's change our mindset for once. It's okay for married couples to walk around hand-in-hand just the two of them for a very very long time. No babies doesn't mean that they are not trying. They have their own agenda, so don't bother them. There's nothing to question about if there's no babies with them. If god wants or wills them with babies then without a doubt they will have one or loads! No use asking questions that no one has answers to except for HIM. Just remember that there are other questions you can ask newly or 'old' weds without any child(ren). But asking almost like asking about their sex life? That is definitely out of the question.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device


glam.mama said...

bravo!! excellent points!!

the moment orang turun pelamin, surely people start asking when. and no matter how many babies you have, it doesn't stop! i still have ppl ask me when i am going to try for a girl *eyeroll* plz mind your own business, kthx.

and you are right, it can be almost cruel to ask that question to couples that are having difficulty TTC. there are so many other topics to talk about la.

Lisa said...

love the post babe. i'm one of those ppl who constantly get harassed over our 'lack of baby'. and honestly, the questions hurt... so very much. i long for a baby. i ache for one. i pray and i dream and i wish to have my own. but i trust in God because i know He'll grant my wishes when He thinks it's time. but i just wish these ppl would get off my back, for heaven's sake. and errghhh i hate it when the men (men can be sooo cruel) make crude and suggestive remarks and dish out so-called 'advice' on how to conceive. i mean, how insensitive n mean can u get? so yeah.. anyway, this topic is such a sore and sensitive one to me.. anyway, kisses to u n ur darling baby boy. take care,hun. speak soon xoxo