Monday, February 01, 2010

Domestic arguments :|

Picture above has nothing to do with the entry. Just wanted something dramatic :)

I seriously think that domestic arguments should be left behind closed doors!!!! NEVER leave your bedroom until the argument has been resolved. I don't understand how some people can blog or even make Facebook status out of their arguments with their other half! What is the point of letting people know that you're being 'mistreated' by your husband (I'm being biased because I normally see these kinda statuses on girl's profiles). I doubt that a guy would do such a thing though.

Sometimes I feel like deleting these people from my Facebook because they're just giving negative vibes. But most of the time, I feel blessed having a husband that understands me. No doubt we have our misunderstandings but we talk it through before going to bed. Nowadays our 'fights' lasts for 10 minutes maximum because we just find it ridiculous to be fighting about petty things. Life is too short to be arguing about everything and anything. Cherish the moments while you still can.

During my wedding reception, my sister gave a speech. It was a compilation of advices from all my siblings. When I first heard the speech I thought, 'oh well, I don't need these kinda advices. We're happy & in love'. But those bouncy-happy-in love- feeling doesn't last long. It doesn't mean you can't get that feeling back though. We worked hard to keep the feeling as if we're still newly weds. One of it is bloomed during arguments! Yes, it's impossible to believe such a thing. That's why we always pause and think for a moment when we argue. I am the type that gives the silent treatment if something goes wrong. Iskandar however, he is a resolver. He makes sure that we sort our disagreements before going to bed. So, sometimes I'd just agree and call it peace because I want my sleep. Hehehe When I wake up the next morning, I realise how silly I can be sometimes. Or even better, I normally forget that we actually had an argument the night before. Forgive & forget, that's the way it should be.

Nowadays, there have been too many marriages that have called it 'quit'. It's as if it's a trend. Even the Malaysian celebrities are in and out of a marriage like it's no biggie. It scares and saddens me, even worse, those with child(ren). Everyday I pray that such a thing won't happen to us and my loved ones. It's just such a precious thing to actually 'give up' on.

My parents always say, "never leave your husband/wife behind, even if it's for a business trip. Always drag them along!". And yes, that's the root to all healthy, admirable & tremendous relationship; To always always always be by your partners' side. Leaving them behind would only make an empty space for other people to 'fill in'. Marriage is not like a couple relationship. You might be able to survive long distance relationship when a couple but once you've got used to having someone by your side 24-7 it's just not the same anymore.

I am not ashamed to admit that I am ever so clingy with Iskandar. It's to a point where I hate going for male & female separate sitting events. Yes, that bad! To me, once we are married it means nothing can come between us. We have worked hard to gain and be in this relationship so why waste it just like that.

So remember, if you have something against your other half, talk to them! Don't let the whole world know about it unless ..... actually, no unless. Work it through, together. Other people would only rub salt to the wound which of course makes it hurt even worse. In the end, you're just too angry & annoyed to listen to your other half. So don't ever talk about it openly. With close friends would be and exception, but seriously, it won't resolve anything until you've spoken to the 'perpetrator'. hehehe

I know I've only been married for 2 years and people would take me for granted. Anyhow, this is also a reminder for myself so that I can always look back and reflect "why I married Iskandar". Insha'Allah I will always try to please and be by my husband & children's side. Always always always!!!!! Amin.


Anna Zulkarnain said...

very insightful, babe! :) hahaha...mike and i fight a lot too but only last for like 15 mins the most. we fight about food all the time lol! and normally we'll get it done before we sleep, because both of us can't sleep until we solve the problem :) btw, i was wondering why would u put the cute boy's picture for the entry...hahaha..but then who cares, the baby is too cute hahaha!!!

glam.mama said...

i also agree that you shouldn't publicize you arguments to the whole world. i think that's just inappropriate!

farhan is a silent treatment kinda guy, but i'm definitely a hardcore resolver ;p funny enough, i'm only that way for my marriage...if i am unhappy with anyone else outside of my marriage, i give them the silent treatment. hehehe. i guess my marriage is the only thing i feel is worth fighting over.

domestic arguments are a must for any healthy relationship - its one of the ways to learn about each others' wants and needs inside the marriage.

JumpSac Baby® Slings said...

These arguments.. they just never end don't they? I want to give the silent treatment, but I just can't stand being silent after about 15mins! Hahahaha. Camne tu?